slayers_desire | trying to make the pieces fit ((Buffyverse plot))

Drusilla laughed. Even with Victor advancing on her and Ed raising the hope gem towards her. "Selfish little lamb. A friend in need... and you won't share?"

"Going to keep the truth to yourself?"

April frowns slightly. Her mother's madness is very close to the voices that are in her mind. And it takes her a second. A second where she feels foolish for not seeing it before.

"Ed... she is telling you to give the hope gem to Victor, who wants to ensure her family is safe."

"Hope gem..." Clark says quietly to himself, turning the thought over in his mind. He and April don't need to see that each other are all right, but the others have no such reassurance.

But if they already have this... how many more do they need? The test is obviously not over.

She takes the gem loosely in her hands, the weight of it so heavy against her palms, and she looks in it and Anya is toddling over into her brother's arms, who is probably complaining about his homework, but he looks happy, like he's glad that he even has homework. Victor was almost too protective to let him attend a real school... she would have homeschooled him in a heartbeat, but he begged and begged, and she didn't build him to keep him locked up.

Cole is cooking with Athena on his hip, and Athena is making the salt shaker float.

She doesn't know that this is real, either. A hope gem could project a false hope. But it's all she has to hold onto. All she has that she can believe in. So she forces herself to believe it. She must. "Thank you."

Ed's not sure what it is, but it feels to him like he should be the one to hold on to the hope gem for safekeeping. He's not used to acting only on little, intangible intuitive leaps like that—that was something Al was always better at. But still... he's also learned not to ignore his instincts, especially in recent months.

He goes over to stand by Victor for a moment, laying his left hand on her shoulder for a moment, squeezing, and then holding his hand out, palm up, in a mute request to return the gem to him. "Are you going to be alright?" he asks her, quietly.

Victor will only need to hold on the hope gem for a moment, before it returns to Ed's protection.

April clings to Clark while Victor checks on her family. "Whatever you see will be the truth. True hope doesn't lie... it doesn't deceive."

"But if we have hope... why the doors?"

"Little lambs must find what hides." Drusilla answers. She moves away from Ed and Victor. With a sweep of her hand, all four doors come together as one. "Choose one to lead. Go together."

Edited 2013-01-05 21:27 (UTC)

Clark doesn't wait for the others to volunteer. He'll face this, whatever it is. And he holds onto April's hand as he leads them through the door, not hesitating. He does not want to be separated from her again.

"No," she answers, honestly, as she returns the gem to Ed. "But I will be. It's not like I can pop over back home and check on my children. I just have to trust."

She offers him her arm. "Shall we? Onto the next big adventure."

Ed accepts the gem back and smiles at her as he snaps open an empty, hard-sided 'pouch' on his utility belt which he keeps on hand for just such an emergency and tucks the hope gem inside it. Then he holds up a finger in a 'one sec' gesture and seals the pouch with Alchemy before taking her arm, hooking his elbow around hers. "Onwards and upwards," he agrees. "Let's go."

Together, they walk through the door(s). They might notice that Drusilla is walking with them still.

The white light flashes, letting them know that they are somewhere different again. This time, they are in Smallville.

Or more appropriate near the Kent farm.

They can hear two men arguing ahead of them. Both voices will be very familiar to both Clark and April. One voice belongs to Lionel Luthor... and the other one belongs to Jonathan Kent.

This isn't the first time Clark has revisited this night, but it never makes it any easier. "Dad..."

He dreads going forward, and at the same time, he knows that he needs to see this again. Another chance to see his dad, to keep the memory alive...

It feels like it's happening now, like he's back at that night again, not just watching it. He lost April that night, for the first time. He thought he'd cheated death. And though he's since come to terms with it, and accepted that it was never his fault, this time he feels the guilt as strongly as it ever was.

He stops inside the barn, seeing Jonathan throw Lionel across the barn, breathing heavily already. And Clark knows the heart attack won't be far behind.

When they arrive, at first Victor isn't sure where she is, but after a moment or two she recognizes the farm. Smallville. This holodeck is very specific. She's sure it's in all of their heads, rifling through memories the way you'd rifle through a deck of cards to shuffle it.

Edited 2013-01-05 22:32 (UTC)

While Ed has been to Clark and April's shared reality before, he's only been to their apartment in Metropolis, and never to Smallville or the Kent farm. He has no idea where they are at first, not until Clark identifies one of the people arguing as his father. From there it's not difficult to figure out that this is where Clark grew up.

He holds on to Victor's arm and follows quietly behind Clark and April, not commenting on what he's seeing at all. He does note Drusilla following them, and momentarily casts a wary glance her way before turning his attention back to what's happening in the barn.

April moves beside Clark, gently taking his hand in hers. She remembers this night too... both versions. The one where she died, and the one that became permanent, where Jonathan died.

She can hear Jonathan's heart race. And knows that this is his last moments.

Meanwhile, behind them, briefly caught by Ed who glanced back... Drusilla is dancing and singing softly a funeral song.

It's so real that Clark wishes he could intervene, somehow stop Jonathan from straining himself to the point of no return. But he knows he can't. And as Lionel leaves the barn, and Jonathan staggers, he knows that it's more than too late.

"Dad..." Clark closes his eyes for a moment, and only then does he notice what Drusilla is doing. He glares at her. "What is this supposed to accomplish?"

Victor's holding her breath; she feels like she's watching an elaborate stageplay, staring at an oil painting, but it's in the part of the theater or museum that she's not allowed to go to. And the play or painting is violent and uncomfortable to look at. "Oh, no," she whispers, holding onto Ed's arm a little tighter.

Ed knows the signs of a heart attack when he sees them. He lets out a short gasp and holds on tighter to Victor's arm as well, shaking a little. He knows what it's like to lose a parent, especially to something that you can't control or do anything about. He lost his mother to an illness she hid from everyone—including her sons—until it was too late to do anything about it, when he was 10. This isn't exactly the same... but it's close enough for Ed to empathize very deeply.

Drusilla twirls, coming to a halt in her dance right in front of Clark. "Not challenging enough for the Man of Steel?"

"Open the pathway..." Another door(s) appear. "Lead the way."

April frowns, tightly holding onto Clark's hand. She glances back at the sight of Jonathan holding his chest... the family arriving too late to save him. "He lives on in our memory..."

"Let's move forward."

"Dad's death was one of the worst moments of my life. I've put it behind me, as much as anyone can. And despite what I thought at the time... it wasn't my fault." Clark stands up a little straighter as he speaks, looking at his dad, and doesn't turn away. Watching him collapse, seeing the rescue that comes far too late. Jonathan Kent's sacrifice was his own choice, and Clark won't dishonor him by refusing to see it. It's the least he can do for the man who gave him so much.

Then, and only then, he turns to go through the next door. If this memory was any indication, the others aren't going to have an easy time of it.

clark in Vic's memory-body is tied to a bed in a room with no windows, legs and arms, and there's a handsome man with dark hair, long and lean, and pale sitting on her legs, a knife in his hand, and Vic's memory body's cream-colored sweater is open to the chest, and the edges are brown with dried blood but there are no cuts to be found, only fresh scars.

She is seventeen and small.

He twirls the knife in his hand and bends over her with great relish, holding the knife the way an artist would hold a paintbrush. He responds to an unsaid statement, to the crying and pleading that the true Victor did at that moment in time. "No use begging, dear Vicky. I'm going to do whatever I want."

He leans down, hovering nose to nose, close enough that if she lifts her chin she'd touch him, not that she'd lift her chin. He presses a gentle kiss to Vic's memory body's lips and then drags the knife, blade down, hard along her ribcage.

By now the pain bothers Victor less than the sensation of her skin splitting, feeling it separate, feeling blood well up and flow.

It's the vastest helplessness a person can manage. Struggle against the bonds and the heavy rope will rub the skin off of your wrists. Scream and no one will hear. There is no hero. No one saves the day.

The real Victor is covering her eyes. "I want to leave, it's time to leave now, so let's go."

Ed starts to feel nauseous and has to cover his mouth for a moment before he turns away from the scene, rage and disgust filling him. Right now he'd like nothing more than to kick this dark-haired sadist's ass back to the stone age; but he can't do that, because he wasn't there, he didn't know Victor back then, and this is only a memory, in which he is a spectator. So instead he turns to Victor and gently pulls her into a hug, letting her lean on his shoulder, however she has to to get through this.

((Last tag for tonight, have to get ready for the concert :). See y'all later!))

April covers her mouth. She can only watch as Clark experiences what Victor once had to go through.

Just like Jonathan's death... there is nothing she can do to change it. Nor can she wish it away.

April glares at her mother. "Our worst memories... he is going to have to go through all of them?"

Drusilla smiled, as sweetly as she could. "He did ask."

April hisses softly, and joins Ed with hugging Victor. She calls out to Clark, but is also talking to Victor in a way... "We are here for you. You are not alone."

Clark was not expecting this, to be put literally in Victor's shoes, unable to move or speak beyond what she said and did at the time. He feels the pain of the knife the way she did, enduring as she had to. The only lifeline he has is that his friends are there.

And he would willingly put himself in her place if it meant sparing her this.

Victor is stiff in their arms but she leans her forehead against Ed's shoulder so she doesn't have to look. She whispers, "This is so embarrassing. Clark, I'm sorry, I'm really sorry."

Another cut, deeper this time and along her forearm, and another kiss, more insistent. "You know," he growls. "He wants me to let him out so he can heal you. But I think I'll have a little fun first. He wants you to know he's sorry. For whatever that counts."

He's in her friend's body. He's in her friend's body as he does this to her.

Which adds a layer of surreality. Clark is in her body while J is in Frea's body, but really, no one's there at all.

"Are you afraid?" J asks.

Real Victor at this moment must have said something smart alecky because she gets slapped across the face, and suddenly J's quiet with rage and he presses the point of his knife right under her chin, at that soft spot that moves when you swallow. "Are you afraid now?"

((Have fun!))

Edited 2013-01-06 00:28 (UTC)

((Okay, I lied a bit... In the intermission right now, and I have time to tag, so I am. :) And yes, I'm having fun!))

Ed refuses to watch what's happening, for both Clark's sake and Victor's. Inwardly, he's dreading the moment when Clark will have to confront his worst moment—and he's not even sure what it's going to be; that's how much pain and sorrow he's had to live through. He's considered a bunch of different events his worst memory at some point or another.

He tries not to dwell too long on it right now, and instead tries to focus on offering comfort to Victor, resting a hand on the crown of her head and the other on her back. And he still wants to beat the everliving snot out of J.

((intermission tag! awesome))

"What do you think lamb... is this challenging enough for the Man of Steel?" Drusilla purrs softly in April's ear.

April growls and turns, swiftly pinning her mother to the wall. "This is inhumane."

"Little lamb has not learned yet. The wolf must be fought." Drusilla signals and a door appears. Just outside of Clark's reach in the memory-body of Victor. "You may pass if he can open it."

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