slayers_desire | this is a whole lot of lemons ((tag bizarro-clark))

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clark

this is a whole lot of lemons ((tag bizarro-clark))

April was still trying to deal with the news she received on Christmas day, that the 'Phantom' was falling in love with her and that her Clark was still missing. Life seemed so hard to live following that... and for a week she just had to deal with her inner turmoils and thoughts. There was few she could turn to for comfort, as having 'Clark-Phantom' around was better than no Clark.

New Year's Day passed with no celebration for her. And It was only by some sort of twisted luck that all of this happened around Christmas holidays. So April could deal with her emotions without having to worry about school.

A full week went by before April finally PINpointed to the farm, where 'Clark-Phantom' was staying. Part of it was to check on the farm itself, to make sure that he was caring for the animals and wasn't raising suspicions with Raya. The other part was to check on the Phantom, who was developing touches of humanity himself. Was trying to find himself.

As bad as things sucked right now for her, April still wanted to help. She couldn't feel for The Phantom the way he claimed he felt for her. But he needed one person who he could be honest around, and right now she was it.

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He'll see her long before she sees him, and he can hardly restrain his relief. Rushing towards her to grab her in a hug, faster than she can blink. "You're okay."

Almost reflexively April's first reaction is to push him away, before the bond kicks in and she realizes this is Clark.

"Kal-El! You are alive!" Her arms go around him tightly. And she chokes back sobs of relief. "Oh my god... you are back."

He's a little confused by her hesitation, but doesn't let go. Hugging her like his life depends on it. "I'm sorry. I wanted to come back, but I couldn't. Jor-El froze me up in the Fortress."

"It has been almost a month." April feels necessary to reveal. She is going to start crying soon, just because all her emotions are piling up one after another and its almost overwhelming.

"I know." He was conscious the entire time, frozen but unable to move, to speak, to even breathe. And cut off from any psychic contact. It was a living hell that he hopes never to experience again.

But he doesn't want her to know that. She looks so stressed, and he can feel her now, the shock of the bond being back almost overwhelming. There will be a chance to talk about it later.

"Sorry I missed Christmas. And New Year's."

"The Phantom has been here." She has to prepare him for that to. "He showed up on Christmas day."

"He's been here that long?" The thought of the phantom being set loose on his world without him there to stop it is a horrifying one. And he has to take a step back, his hands on her shoulders, to look her over. "Has he hurt you?"

"No." April just wants to celebrate his return. But instead, she has to give him all this bad news (and its only the topping of the iceberg).

"He has all your memories and I think they settled in because... he claims to love me. And he has been posing as you for the last month, after saving the lives of Chloe and Lana."

He can't be angry at the phantom for saving his friends, but trying to step into his shoes, to love his girlfriend... and all while he's up to who knows what. It makes him upset, and determined to stop him from doing whatever it is he's doing. "Do you know where he is?"

"He went to the Fortress to find a cure for the fact he can't be out in sunlight. I haven't seen him since he left."

"Don't go after him Kal-El. Something is different."

"He is different."

"Jor-El said I have to defeat him... that's why he released me." And he's not that eager to disobey again. But he is willing to listen, because he trusts her. "Different how?"

April is torn right now. She wants to respect Jor-El, but she is really angry that he put her through this hell without any concern for her welfare.

"He feels like a failed experiment. Like he was never given a chance. And it reminds me of how I felt when I left Qua-Toth."

That gets his attention. He's having a hard time feeling sympathy for the phantom, or any of the Zoners really, but April is another matter. They don't talk about Qua-Toth often. But he knows a little of what it was like. What it did to her to grow up there. And she's come out of it far more adjusted than most people might be. Not just a good person, but the woman he loves, without reservation.

The idea that the phantom has changed, or wants to change, especially after living his life... it's a hard idea to swallow. "He's only been here for a week... are you sure we can trust him?"

"He hasn't tried to hurt me. Or force me into anything I didn't want to do. And he was concerned for me... because I sort of had to deal with one of the Witches while you were gone."

"I know that you can't trust anyone from the Zone because of what happened to you in there. And I get that..."

"I just don't want you two fighting. I can't handle that right now."

"He'll be back eventually... I don't know what will happen then." But he's not running off in search of the phantom just yet. He's listening to her. Conflicted on what to do.

"Are you okay?"

"No." She can't break down right now, but she desperately wants to. "I don't know what you suffered while Zor-El had you, but this was hell for me. Kara is still missing. The Phantom is living your life. The bond was gone... just gone... and I..."

She has to stop herself to prevent a sobfest.

Phantom or no phantom, it's hug time again. He wraps her up in his arms, holding her tight. "I'm sorry. I never wanted any of this to happen."

Sobbing a little into his embrace, April really needs the comfort of the bond right now. "Its not your fault."

He's happy to give as much support, physically and over their bond, as he can. He's missed it so much over the last few weeks. Missed her.

"We'll argue about blame later, okay? For old times' sake." It's an attempt to make things a little more lighthearted, a kind of half-joke to make her feel better. Though he knows it's going to take a while for them both to recover from this trial.

((Bed time))

"You... can't take the blame. Because then you might leave and I... I can't lose you again. Not now. Please... not now." April has been through a lot and unfortunately she is not quite ready for lighthearted jokes.

He can feel that anguish and desperate need for him through the bond. The last month was worse than anything she experienced in Qua-Toth.

((night))

"I'm not going to leave," he assures her, just hugging her tight. "Not ever again, if I can help it."

((Couldn't leave her like that, poor girl. One more for the night))

"Thank you." April whispers.

"Not having you here, not having the bond, it was just really hard."

"I just missed you." She touched his face.

"I missed you too. Missed this," he says, sending another mental nudge her way, glad to feel her again. "Being trapped in the Fortress was like being trapped away from sunshine." From anyone else, it would still be a loving analogy, but to him, the sun is what gives him his life, his strength.

Those little nudges from their bond were helping her to calm down. And she nuzzled him after his statement.

"I never gave up on you."

He kisses her forehead. "I know. And I love you."

((Gotta run, will be back in several hours))

Yay, I finally get to use my new icon

Pretty!

Thanks!

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month = week, right?

yah. d'oh!

To be fair, it would be a month if this was canon, lol

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